You think all love songs are insincere. You have a belief that love cannot live in these human relationships. You become an angry critic of the novels and movies that tell love. All this may be true. But you can fall in love with all these judgments.
You did not have a say in the context of the efficiency and peace of your business life, you behave as if your hands are tied. This is not my job, you say. Many of your friends agree. Business life means almost the entire life. You must spend happy. If you trust your skills, whenever you turn to jobs for them, it's time to turn.
You are entering a comfortable period. You passed through the friendly bridges that you thought you could not jump. You are in a constant discussion with your friends who care about money. You should also have a discussion with yourself about these friendships. That is what you think.
You should resolve your contradiction with your business life as soon as possible. The huge dissatisfaction there can turn into deep crises.